I've spent some really boring moments on my butt lately. Having a torn ACL and meniscus means I don't get around much. Someone thought it was a bad idea to give me crutches because of my dislocated elbow and fractured humerus. Yeah, when I get hurt, I get really hurt. I was really mad at first, anything that restricts my freedom enrages me. Part of my rebellious nature, no one is going to tell me what I can and can't do. This is why I think this happened in the first place. Kinda like the universe put me on a time out. It's the only way I would have been forced to stop and make a plan. If you know me, then you know I do best flying by the seat of my pants. Not saying that planning is bad, I just know life never goes as planned.
Since my forced time out, I've reflected on the things I want, how to get them and who I am, minus the 220lbs that I just left my life. I came across a book my mom had on numerology. I've never really played with numerology. I have much respect for it. I believe in the trinity and divine number 7. Everything has a vibration to it, even numbers. While playing around with the concepts, I've learned that my twins and I both have Master Number 22 and my oldest Master Number 11 as a life path.
When I learned about what Master Number 22 was all about, I had an "ah ha" moment. The very concept of 22 is bringing dreams into reality. Taking from above and creating here on earth. Anyone who knows me knows if I want something, I find a way to get it, no matter what it is. It's kind of a trademark of mine. It annoys some because I don't have to work hard for it, and it's seen as wasted talent. For me, it does make me a bit lazy. I just always saw it as luck.
The more I read about this Master Number I learned it comes with great potential but also causes a bit of stress. Expectations of yourself become a point of contention in the sense of failure. You're set up for success but something inside of you is scared to death. The fear you will fail. Yes, that fun bit of perfectionism can really do a number on your self esteem in terms of failing. The more I read I realized this is the same thing as my Saturn trine Neptune. Saturn in 7th and Neptune in 10th, both angular houses.
Saturn trine Neptune is the aspect that makes dreams come true, all you need is to have faith and hard work. Well Hot Damn! Two different systems with the same aspects. I remember being looked at crazy when I would tell people I believed anything was possible, just imagine it. These aspects also come with a flip side. If you see things in the negative that is what you will receive. A gift and a curse. The vibration of the mind no matter what state it is in, will manifest a tangible outcome.
I'm going to have knee surgery soon. That means several more months down. Oh well, gives me plenty of time to think about all the things I would like to create. Being in this bad relationship had sucked the creativity out of me. The funny thing I read about Master Number 22, on the lower end I would "... slip into the depths obscurity, achieving little more than personal support." That is exactly what my marriage did, made me the personal advisor to an ungrateful individual. If I have to spend months on my arse in order to realize the higher end of my potential again, so be it.
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